July 12, 2013

• Il a fait longtemps…

  …mais, maintenant j’ai l’opportunite de m’exprimer comme je dois…

  ***DISCLAIMER: SUPER BORING POST AHEAD***

  I have nothing profound or interesting to share, so here’s a spontaneous collection of Friday tidbits:

  This afternoon I found myself rather down without explanation. It’s not even that time of the month! (FYI: It’s never that time of the month, since I don’t have the right equipment (FYI: when I say “equipment” I mean ovaries, a uterus, and the whole bit (FYI: I don’t have the right equipment because I’m male (FYI: this ever-developing parenthetical is an attempt at an absurdist-type joke (Get it?)))).

  Before my negotiations class, I wrote on the board: “An obscene and offensive comment.” Nobody seemed to get it.

  I made a really good gazpacho Andaluz to go with my pizza, beer, and salad tonight. #stilleatsalone

  My youngest brother has really long hair. There is a big part of me that wants me to let my hair grow out just to out “do” him.

  A couple weeks ago, Professor Bird (named change for privacy) called on me in class. I didn’t do well–I missed the point of the case (we were supposed to see that the standard for getting a jury trial despite a waiver is really the same in civil and criminal courts, but I read it as a pathway for getting a jury trial even when a lawyer messes up). ANYWAY, I needed to unwind from the week, so I went to see “The Heat,” but I snuck some pocket shots into the movies with me. After I had about two “dranks” that I mixed with my over-priced soda, I saw Professor Bird and his wife walking up the aisle to take their seats at the movie. For one, you don’t want to see your PC professor at the movies. For two, you don’t want your PC professor to know that you sneak alcohol into the movies. For three, I had performed badly that day. For four, you don’t want to see your PC professor at the movies. I was waiting to be assigned a memo after the movie that discussed all the Fourth, Fifth, and Eighth Amendment  (and possibly 14th due-process) violations that Melissa McCarthy’s character committed during the course of the movie. Luckily, that didn’t happen.

  I bought an orchid on clearance a couple weeks ago. The first bud has started to open. It should be fully open tomorrow afternoon. #goodinvestment

  My life is frightfully boring right…you know, apart from the constant fear. #joysofpracticecourt

  I think I’m going to apply for a position at the UN. If anyone knows anyone in either New York or Geneva who works for the UN, tell them what a wonderful person I am AND that I would be a great asset at the UN.

  Sometimes I feel like I was more of a grownup when I was 20 than I am now. Sometimes I feel like if I went back to talk to my 15-year-old self, he would be disappointed with me. Actually, I’m certain he would be.

  I’ve decided children should be taxed. That is, there should tax liability on parents for having children–probably tiered to income. I also believe that no one under 18 should have to pay income taxes.

  I found a recliner that I really liked that was priced well on Craigslist. Unfortunately, I’m too neurotic to make the call to see if it’s still available.

  Lately, I’ve been fascinated by my ability to believe things that I know are objectively not true. If only I had the clarity of perspective of the guano collector from Lord Jim!

  I don’t know how I feel about Xanga possibly shutting down. On the one hand, this has been an important place for me. On another, I feel like leaning here in some way keeps me stunted.

  • 9:19 pm
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